Tag Archives: avoid the knight in shining armor rule

Love Me Tinder

24 Monday Apr 2017

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Recently, one of our team members has been watching the Netflix original series of “Hot Girls Wanted: Turned On.” The series covers pornography, dating apps and how our society views sex in modern times.

daint

On the second episode, “Love Me Tinder,” a handful of people ranging from their 20’s to 40 and their interaction with dating apps. Some looking for love – others using dating apps for hookups and viewing apps as a superficial way to meet attractive singles. The episode is a reality check to viewers and app users to really know who you are spending your times with.

Tips from certified Dating Coach Tara Richter:

With online dating sometimes you find someone worth hiding your profile for a while to see where and how the relationship develops. Everything seems great at first, then as time passes you begin to notice little quirks about them you can’t stand: how he scraps his fork again the plate while eating and sounds like a bear in hibernation during the night. Finally you decide it just isn’t there like you thought in the beginning. It’s time to have “the talk” and move on. There’s no point (for either person) trying to force something that simply is not there.

 

Internet Dating Rule #8 – Are You Doing THIS Wrong?!

14 Tuesday Mar 2017

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Back on the dating tip track, today we are exploring internet dating rule #8: Going Back on Dating Websites —

online-dating-websites-696x492

With online dating sometimes you find someone worth hiding your profile for a while to see where and how the relationship develops. Everything seems great at first, then as time passes you begin to notice little quirks about them you can’t stand: how he scraps his fork again the plate while eating and sounds like a bear in hibernation during the night. Finally you decide it just isn’t there like you thought in the beginning. It’s time to have “the talk” and move on. There’s no point (for either person) trying to force something that simply is not there.

It’s time to put your profile back up and start from square one.

When you get back onto dating sites it’s important that you update your profile. Even if it has only been a couple of months, things have changed. Hopefully you have learned from the last relationship so you can better understand what it is you are looking for.

Start with your photos. Even if your weight hasn’t fluctuated or you haven’t drastically changed your hair, fresh pictures are important because it means you are truly representing yourself. (You may think you look the same as you did last summer, but others may beg to differ). Also, posting new photos will most likely attract new people.

Remember to always have at least one close up facial photo and one full length body pose. Wear appropriate clothing too please. If you post a boob shot, or a slutty dress don’t be shocked by emails from guys only interested in one night stands.

How to Get a Date in 20 minutes or LESS

12 Monday Sep 2016

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

craigslist-adGetting a date is really easier than you think. I was going to a black tie event in Tampa Bay and I wanted a date to accompany me. I had a few guys I know would go, but I wanted to take someone new. So I posted an AD on Craigslist (yes Craigslist) for exactly what I was looking for and got my date in less than 20 minutes.

  1. Be precise in what you are looking for
  2. Within the AD describe in more detail
  3. Post a good photo of you
  4. Weed out responses quickly

If you’re not getting the responses you want, it might be your photos, your headline or you’re not describing in detail exactly what you want. Be honest with yourself – how are people really seeing you? Are you representing yourself honestly? Do you need to lose some weight? Get your hair done? Be the best you that you can be and you will attract a partner that you are worthy of and vice versa! Tinder is also a valuable resource for quick dates! Just swipe right for love!

Get more Offline dating tips with “10 Rules to Survive the Dating Jungle” today! Now available on Amazon.

PayPal Button

The Dating Jungle Series as seen on BBC’s Almost Royal

Building Your Self-Esteem

11 Thursday Aug 2016

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

kimBefore you can love someone, you have to love yourself. Having high self-esteem is one of the first steps of being ready for a healthy relationship. We all can’t have Kim Kardashian’s self-esteem. I mean come on, the woman has her own selfie book. Can’t get any more confident than that.

The following are tips that to help build continuous upward momentum towards higher self-esteem: (written by Jae Song & Tina Su on http://www.thinksimplenow.com)

  1. Start Small – Start with something you can do immediately and easily. When we start with small successes, we build momentum to gain more confidence in our abilities. Each completed task, regardless of how small, is a building block towards a more confident you. What are some small actions you can take immediately to demonstrate that you are capable of achieving goals you’ve set for yourself? For example, clean your desk, organize your papers, or pay all your bills.
  2. Create a Compelling Vision – Use the power of your imagination. Create an image of yourself as the confident and self-assured person you aspire to become. When you are this person, how will you feel? How will others perceive you? What does your body language look like? Write a description of this person and all the attributes you’ve observed.
  3. Socialize – Get out of the house or setup a lunch date with a friend. Socializing with others will give us opportunities to connect with other people, and practice our communication and interpersonal skills.
  4. Set Goals – According to a study done at Virginia Tech, 80% of Americans say that they don’t have goals. And the people who regularly write down their goals earn nine times as much over their lifetime as people who don’t. By setting goals that are clear and actionable, you have a clear target of where you want to be.

For the rest of the tips for building your self-esteem get your copy of “10 Rules to Survive the Internet Dating Jungle” here! Utilize Certified Dating Coach, Tara Richter’s, 10 rules to help you navigate your way through internet dating sites to find your loving Jane or Tarzan.

Get more Offline dating tips with “10 Rules to Survive the Dating Jungle” today! Now available on Amazon.

PayPal Button

The Dating Jungle Series as seen on BBC’s Almost Royal

Trump Supporters create Singles Dating Website

08 Monday Aug 2016

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

In the chaos of the upcoming election it seems as though our political stances are becoming a new topic in the dating world. Since when did talking about your political affiliation turn into a topic for your first date? In general, politics should stay out of the mix – at least for the first few dates… unless you’re a government official. The divide between Trump and Clinton supporters has been, what seems to be, the most heated in election history. Whether you’re for or against Trump, his supporters are having a problem finding their perfect match outside of the rallies. They can’t seem to find anyone who can match their same passion and support for theirRepublican presidential candidate.  That’s where TrumpSingles.com comes in “Make Dating Great Again!” I guess there won’t be any walls built around hearts on this site… trump singles

The site itself has been shutdown – for unknown reasons but the Facebook page Singles for Trump is still going strong with over 2,650 likes. The Facebook page posts information about single Trump supporters along with other posts that read “So, you just wasted another unfulfilled Saturday night hooking up with a Clinton-Supporting Dud, who listened to Arcade Fire on repeat and mumbled “Mommy” in his sleep. Girlfriend, there’s a far better way to quench your thirst and find a real man. The best dagum dating site on Facebook, Singles For Trump!”

I am in no way supporting this site, nor would you find my profile posted, but for the sake of you Trump supporters who are trying to find love – there is still hope.

 

Internet Dating Jungle Rule #9: Stop Making Excuses

09 Monday Dec 2013

Posted by in Dating Advice

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

TaraRichterDatingCoach6Going back out on the dating jungle is scary, especially if you have been off the market for a while. But if you’re finding it hard to take that jump, you need to remember: stop making excuses and, like Nike says, JUST DO IT! Excuses are just a defense mechanism to put up a wall to not allow someone else in. In order to find love you must first be willing to open yourself up to it. Take your walls down, heal your wounds and start going on dates….and, most importantly, stop with the excuses!

Give someone, anyone a chance. You have to start somewhere. My first date after divorce was a disaster, but that didn’t stop me. It’s a numbers game, but you have to start with the first date. If it doesn’t work out onto the next, that’s called dating. Keep going on dates until you narrow it down by utilizing my weeding out procedures. Just get out there! This should be a fun process getting to meet new people and doing fun stuff.

Be Honest With Yourself

Everyone has a perception of themselves and if someone gives them a reflection they don’t like, they can’t handle it. The truth hurts because we don’t want to accept it. If someone is trying to help you or tell you areas that need improving, try to listen.

For example:; if you’re a guy that finds that after every date you take a woman on she disappears and never returns phone calls or texts, don’t get upset if someone tells you why. At least now you know. Maybe you can take that and turn it into something positive to improve yourself. Nothing is ever lost from an experience. Don’t let your ego get in the way of learning.

If a date doesn’t go well, instead of just ignoring the person let them know. Wouldn’t it be nice to have feedback from your dates versus dead silence? I’m not talking about ill malice type comments, but truthful. If they ask, tell them.

It’s not easy to look in the mirror. But every now and then we have to. Take these experiences to learn and grow. We all go through difficult times in our lives, let’s make the best of them.

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.

Internet Dating Rule #8: Going Back on Dating Websites

06 Friday Dec 2013

Posted by in Dating Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Amazon CodeWith online dating sometimes you find someone worth hiding your profile for a while to see where and how the relationship develops. Everything seems great at first, then as time passes you begin to notice little quirks about them you can’t stand: how he scraps his fork again the plate while eating and sounds like a bear in hibernation during the night. Finally you decide it just isn’t there like you thought in the beginning. It’s time to have “the talk” and move on. There’s no point (for either person) trying to force something that simply is not there.

It’s time to put your profile back up and start from square one.

When you get back onto dating sites it’s important that you update your profile. Even if it has only been a couple of months, things have changed. Hopefully you have learned from the last relationship so you can better understand what it is you are looking for.

Start with your photos. Even if your weight hasn’t fluctuated or you haven’t drastically changed your hair, fresh pictures are important because it means you are truly representing yourself. (You may think you look the same as you did last summer, but others may beg to differ). Also, posting new photos will most likely attract new people.

Remember to always have at least one close up facial photo and one full length body pose. Wear appropriate clothing too please. If you post a boob shot, or a slutty dress don’t be shocked by emails from guys only interested in one night stands.

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.

Rule # 7: Is This the One for Me?

26 Tuesday Nov 2013

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

TaraRichterDatingCoachEveryone can put on their best behavior in the beginning, the true test is when difficult times and chaos arise; that will show someone’s true colors. Remember to keep your head on straight and your feet on the ground!

The 3 Date Rule

If you’ve been out on 3 dates and you’re just not sure if you’re feeling it, move on. It shouldn’t take that long to discover if you’re attracted to someone or not. There’s no point in continuing to date someone if the chemistry isn’t there. They may be the sweetest guy in the world or the nicest girl, but if it doesn’t get your engines going by now it probably won’t ever. Don’t get stuck with Puppy Dog Syndrome (Rule # 5 from my first book. Dating someone you feel sorry for or dating down.)

Dating Tests

When you first start dating someone, you may or may not realize you are putting that person through a series of tests. It’s good to see how this person reacts in different situations. Here are a few tests I’ve done with a guy to see if someone can go the distance:

1) The Mall Test –See how long he can stand watching you pick out clothes and trying stuff on. Does he get agitated easily or is he happy to hold your purse for you? If you’re going to be in a long-term relationship with someone you each are going to have to compromise your time. Make sure he’s at least willing to be a good sport for you.

2) The Alcohol Test – This one you probably want to wait until you know the other person fairly well. Act a little foolish, do something kind of stupid in public and see how he reacts. Is he completely embarrassed and ridicule you like a child? Or does he take care of you like a gentleman should?  Not everyone is perfect all the time. There may be times when you’re sick, emotional or a little tipsy. You want to know that this guy has your back.

NOTE: Does your date drive you to drink? A key indicator they are not the right person for you is if you have to impair your judgment just to tolerate someone.

3) The Friend Test – Once you decide you do like this person and want to introduce them to your friends, start with a small group setting as to not overwhelm them. See how he treats your friends.

4) The Pet Test – Animals have great instincts. They can sniff out a jerk and can also sense a caring person. If you have a dog, cat or something else, bring your date home and watch how he interacts with them. If your pet really doesn’t like a certain person, the animal’s instincts are probably right.

Signs To Be Aware Of:

Controlling behavior: Are they always excessively calling and/or texting and get upset when you don’t respond right away? Do they always want to know where and who you’re with? Do they get upset when you don’t succumb to their demands? If you feel like you’re constantly struggling in your relationship and they are showing any signs of controlling behaviors, get out.

Manipulating behavior: Do they get inside your head to make you think that your opinions, ideas or thoughts are not logical? Do they keep turning the tables so they always win? Do they deny responsibility for their own behaviors? Don’t allow someone to spin the tables on you. Listen to what makes sense.

Your Dreams:  If you’re not sure where your relationship is going, dreams can tell you a lot about what’s going on in your life. When the body rests the subconscious mind will allow thoughts to emerge at night that during the daytime your consciousness will not allow. Relax, stop over thinking and let your mind do the work. 

Be happy with yourself. Know deep down inside that you will be good and survive no matter who comes in or out of your life.  When you’re secure within yourself you will glow with that self-confidence which attracts other healthy people.

 

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.

 

Rule #6: Be Safe, Research Your Date

19 Tuesday Nov 2013

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

This is something we can and should do throughout everything in our lives especially with dating. Even if you meet a guy/girl in person at a bar, you don’t know who they really are.

When you set up dates make sure to:
• Drive your own car and meet somewhere public
• Tell one of your friends that where going and the name of your date
• Never meet anyone at their house or yours
It’s best to keep meeting in public places until the third date or so, just to make sure you think you know the other person well enough to come and pick you up.

Finding out if Your Date is Safe
There are lots of free resources online, depending on what county you live in, just Google certain items. In most counties you can search criminal files and the jail database. It’s all public information to find out who’s in jail and what crime they are being held for.
You can get more in depth information about the different resources and tools you can use for searching information on people here.

How to Find Out if Someone you Met Online is Married

Unfortunately this happens quit often within the online dating scene. There are signs to tell if the person you are talking to on the internet is married or already in a committed relationship based on behaviors I have witnessed:

  • They don’t have a photo on their profile.
  • They only email you and will not give out their phone number.
  • They give you their phone number, but only call during working hours and disappear after 6 or 7 PM.
  • They will only meet you in secluded paces off the beaten path.
  • They are never available around the holidays.

Utilize these helpful hints if you think they’re might be something suspicious with a person you’re chatting with online or just started dating. The only thing you can always turn to when you have questions is your gut. Trust yourself and your intuitions.

In this day and age of meeting people over the internet, chat rooms and all other methods, you need to make sure to be safe. Making sure that your potential date is not a serial killer might seem a little overboard, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.

 

Rule # 5: When to Take it Offline

12 Tuesday Nov 2013

Posted by in Dating Advice, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

TaraRichterDatingCoach4If you have finally meet someone you’re interested in and have been communicating with them online or over the phone, it’s time to set up a meet-n-greet. This should be planned within two weeks of talking—don’t wait any longer than that. The reason for this is because, typically, if people spend too long talking through a screen it is hard to determine whether or not you have real chemistry. Sure, you may click—conversation is great, you’re getting along and they are becoming increasingly easier to talk to. But if you prolong this part of the process your image of this person and your (potential) relationship can get easily misconstrued and distorted. Don’t fall victim to this trap. Until you meet someone in person it’s easy to convince yourself they are the perfect person. Sometimes it’s just nice to have someone to talk to. But if you want a real relationship to develop, it’s imperative you take it offline.

Appropriate Meet-n-Greets

I do not consider the initial meet-n-greets actual dates because you do not really know how much you like a person until you meet them offline. These are meet-n-greets, not dates, for a reason. They are supposed to be quick—anywhere between 10 and 30 minutes. You really don’t need more than that to determine if you connect with them. Maybe you go on 10 meet-n-greets before you meet someone you’re interested in going out to dinner with, and that’s fine. It’s part of the process.

Set up a place to meet for coffee or maybe ice cream if you are not a coffee drinker. Although many people like to meet for a drink at a local happy hour, I advise against this. One drink can quickly turn into three and before you know it, your buzz is convincing you that you’re more interested in this person than you really are. Coffee dates don’t long to finish; if you don’t have chemistry you can pay your (very inexpensive) bill and go on your separate ways. If you do hit it off, you can make future plans for a date and have something to look forward to.

The Golden Rule of Meet-n-Greets

An important tip for these dates: make sure to listen to your date. I know, easier said than done—especially if you are someone who talks when they are nervous. But there is a Golden Rule of meet-n-greets (yes, treat them how you want to be treated, but there’s more to it); if you do not feel a connection with the person during this short encounter, don’t make plans for a real date. There are plenty of people out there and it’s important to remember when meeting people and surviving the Dating Jungle that you are never going to meet your Jane/Tarzan if you are too busy settling for the mediocre out of your fear of never finding someone.

Download the entire chapter on Rule #5 on Kindle here

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.