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TaraRichterDatingCoach6Going back out on the dating jungle is scary, especially if you have been off the market for a while. But if you’re finding it hard to take that jump, you need to remember: stop making excuses and, like Nike says, JUST DO IT! Excuses are just a defense mechanism to put up a wall to not allow someone else in. In order to find love you must first be willing to open yourself up to it. Take your walls down, heal your wounds and start going on dates….and, most importantly, stop with the excuses!

Give someone, anyone a chance. You have to start somewhere. My first date after divorce was a disaster, but that didn’t stop me. It’s a numbers game, but you have to start with the first date. If it doesn’t work out onto the next, that’s called dating. Keep going on dates until you narrow it down by utilizing my weeding out procedures. Just get out there! This should be a fun process getting to meet new people and doing fun stuff.

Be Honest With Yourself

Everyone has a perception of themselves and if someone gives them a reflection they don’t like, they can’t handle it. The truth hurts because we don’t want to accept it. If someone is trying to help you or tell you areas that need improving, try to listen.

For example:; if you’re a guy that finds that after every date you take a woman on she disappears and never returns phone calls or texts, don’t get upset if someone tells you why. At least now you know. Maybe you can take that and turn it into something positive to improve yourself. Nothing is ever lost from an experience. Don’t let your ego get in the way of learning.

If a date doesn’t go well, instead of just ignoring the person let them know. Wouldn’t it be nice to have feedback from your dates versus dead silence? I’m not talking about ill malice type comments, but truthful. If they ask, tell them.

It’s not easy to look in the mirror. But every now and then we have to. Take these experiences to learn and grow. We all go through difficult times in our lives, let’s make the best of them.

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is a Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and a Show Host.