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Long gone is the age old saying, “You complete me.” You shouldn’t wait around for someone to complete yourself. In a healthy relationship it takes two whole human beings coming together.

I was watching The View while waiting in the green room for my live ABC interview the other day and they ladies were talking about women’s self esteem. They quoted Kim Kardashian as stating that she gets her self-esteem from her now boyfriend Kayne West. Whoopi Goldberg then appropriately asks, “If the self-esteem comes from him, when they break-up does he takes it with him?”

It’s a great statement and reason why you should never place your self-worth in the hands of someone else. Yes, your boyfriend, husband and or wife may make you feel good about yourself, but if you’re in a toxic relationship they can also make you feel like crap. That’s how controlling people cut you down so you don’t think you deserved to be loved and makes it hard to leave abusive relationships.

Now lets look at it from a different perspective? Lets say you loved yourself 100% and made yourself whole. Then men or women could come in and out of your life and you would only be slightly affected. It maybe sad if something didn’t work out, but that’s life. You also would know that you deserve nothing less than someone who treats you like gold and wouldn’t allow scum bags around you. All your self-esteem and self-worth came from inside you so then no one would able to take it away from you.

Tara Richter

Tara Richter is an Internet Dating Coach in Tampa Bay. She is the author of “The Dating Jungle Series” and an Internet TV Show Host.